Does that story seem a little shallow to you? It does to me, but, of course, i lived through it so i know exactly how shallow it was. What fails to come through in the retelling of it is that was the first time something almost worked out. I was done having crushes on those beauty queen bitches who wouldn’t give me the time of day, and i thought i was mature enough to date someone. Of course, that wasn’t true, because i couldn’t take her off of my pedestal or climb up there myself. Still, the first time your heart gets broken for real isn’t any fun. And you’d think i’d know better by now…
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fuck it. If people can’t deal with me using their names they can kindly ask me to replace them with a pseudonym. I promise not to slander anyone too bad (other than Viktor).
One of the most crucial crushes of my life came in the beginning of Sophomore year of high school. Her name was Juliana, and she was just cool. She was newly a Freshman, but had gone to Masterman for junior high as well, so i had seen her around the year before. She had amazing style, incredible taste in music, she was mature, and beautiful. I fell head over heels immediately, as is my course in life. She may have been oblivious at first, but soon she must have known since my every week hung precariously upon the one period where we both attended the same meeting.
Through some wrangling by my dedicated friends Juliana was invited to our friend’s massive yearly Halloween party (you’ll come to see that the week leading up to Halloween is rather crucial in my romantic life). I dressed simple as a doctor rather than as the stunning prostitute i was the year before, and set off to charm Juliana. I did a decent job, and in one heartstopping moment she admitted that she might actually go out with me
It was all downhill from there. Her evil evil evil meddling friend Emma poked and prodded at my fragile psyche until i awkwardly asked Juliana out the next week. Emma also managed to make sure Juliana didn’t meet me where we said we would, and accompanied us the whole night. The get together was aborted when Emma dragged Juliana away with her onto a bus. I was miserably let down, and promptly went home and cried to Gina on the phone. There were no other ‘dates.’
So there you go, the first of many huge let downs in my (non-existent) romantic life. Juliana and i went on to be fairly good friends, and she attended both a David Bowie concert and the Junior Prom with me. She just left town to go to college.
I still dislike Emma.
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wow, i finally sat down and finished the legendary site map. Gasp in awe of my ultra-clunk use of html! And, now that i’ve worked on my site a bit, i can get back to wasting time in here.
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Focusing a bit much on quantity, aren’t i? Maybe i should tell a story.
When i get a crush on something or someone, i crush hard. I have a very addictive personality, and finding something like blogger is all i need to lose a week or two of my life. Sometimes i lose time to such things, but just as often i lose it to people. To girls. Sometimes i misplace my heart too.
So, in the spirit of High Fidelity, this is the start of a series of my five best/worst crushes ever. #1 on the list by the widest margin known to man is…
Oh, shoot, now i’ve got to decide if i wanna be obscure or name names. I’ll have to get back to you on this one in an hour or two. Enjoy the suspense.
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“Too many pieces are falling off… and I can’t pick them up quickly enough….” Fluffy Battle Kitten very succinctly just described a feeling i often have. WoW, i’m just a linky little whore today, aren’t i? But, really, how can you argue with a site named Fluffy Battle Kitten?