So, after months upon months of bitching and whining, i’m actually internet window-shopping for a webcam as we speak with my credit card in hand.

I’m having a hard time deciding ultimate whether or not i want a cam. Firstly, i’m sure to shell out $50 to $100 for it, which i could be putting towards a decent digital camera or new musical gear. But, more importantly, i don’t really want to take the mystique out of my bitching and whining. You can hear my songs; they are real. I can talk and talk and talk about how wonderful my songs are, but ultimately you can sit down and listen and decide for yourself because i make them available to you.

I am painted differently on here than i am in real life, which is why my friends occasionally have trouble when experiencing both narratives simultaneously. It’s really not intentional on my part; it’s just like how the sound of your own voice is wholly different when you just hear it vibrating through your own cheekbones compared to listening to yourself on an answering machine. Part of what allows me to illustrate myself in such a fashion is that you’re blind to me; when i talk about fabulous hair cuts or early morning beauty, you have to just take my word for it. Aside from the scattered and few pictures of me i occasionally let slip through the great majority of readers don’t know what i look like. And, maybe i enjoy that. Maybe having my image streamed onto the site at regular intervals will make it all too literal and boring. Maybe you’ll get bored with me once you see me for how i am.


So, if you were me with $100 burning a hole in your pocket, what would you do?