When I go out to eat I am imbued with a special power – restaurant food renders me as THE HUMAN CALCULATOR!
Okay, not really. It’s just that I do quick math in my head all of the time, and compared to the amortization schedules I’ve been juggling lately calculating tips is hardly a challenge.
Why do people need calculators to do this! Here’s an example, from a recent five-person lunch outing that was totally not unique in that I acted as the human calculator.
I know and you know I simply have to multiply the check amount by one plus whatever the tip amount is, but I am the sort of person who does math in chunks. Thus:
The bill was $123.
10% is $12.30, so…
20% is $24.60.
We didn’t want to tip 20%, just 18%…
So, subtract 10% ($1.23) twice from $24.60.
After rounding, the tip is $22, meaning…
the total bill is $145, and we would each pay…
$29 total.
I did that in my head once in about 17 seconds, and then mentally checked my math before people were done with the tip calculator programs on their cell phones. And then they didn’t trust me because I used 18% instead of 20% and rounded by .14 cents, so they calculated it AGAIN!
And then they were like, “Whoa, you totally did that in your head.”
Seriously? SERIOUSLY?! I’m all for computers and smart phones and iPads, but have we seriously become a nation that is so terrifyingly awful at math that we’re intimidated by leaving a tip?! Move the decimal over one place, double that (or, add half if the service was bad), and adjust if necessary. The end.
No wonder mortgage lenders expected me to roll over and play dead whenever they’d change their offer to something seemingly lower. Maybe mere mortals would be tricked, but not THE HUMAN CALCULATOR.
seriously, you’re bashing people who are bad at math? are you a super genius at everything you do? Do you use a spellchecker when you write your articles?
I don’t. I can spell purfektly. I am the human spellcheck.
Seriously, when did we become a nation that is so terrifyingly awful at spelling that we’re unable to write something without a spellchecker.
Frank – I ask that question about spelling all the time! I certainly have my problem words, and some bad grammatical habits to pair with them. If I always rely on spellcheck to catch that then I’m in trouble the next time I hand-write a note.
I think there is a difference between using spell-check as a reference – like a dictionary, to proof something you think could be incorrect – and using it as a failsafe to allow yourself to be oblivious of the right way to do things.
Their check on my math was the former, and totally cool – that’s what dictionaries and calculators are for! But our urge to pre-emptively whip out a computer to count and spell for us is the latter, and I’m definitely “bashing” that.
Thanks!
I was thinking about that when I was updating my checkbook the other day — which I do with a pen and paper. I make myself do it without a calculator because I’m afraid my brain will rot if I don’t. I’m not quite the whiz you are but I can do tips in my head pretty easily even after happy hour.
.-= Pamela´s last blog ..Destroyers =-.
The reason that transaction would stress me out is because I wouldn’t be sure if I’d be comfortable with an 18% tip, rounded down. (The average tip in Philly, I think I read, is actually a fraction above 20%.) Or because I’d add my chosen tip percentage and end up with a dollar amount that’s not a multiple of $5, and wonder if people would think I’m weird for suggesting that we all pay $17.60. Or because we each pay our own way rather than splitting evenly, but some jerk doesn’t play fair and we end up with like a 14% tip.
My point is, it’s not the math.
why don’t you want to tip 20%?
Always the ones I barely post that get the comments.
Pam: That’s it exactly. Some things I just have to do with brainpower, lest it evaporate completely. It’s bad enough I had to remind myself how to find the slope of a line the other day. I don’t want to turn 30 and forget how to do long division.
Desh: I certainly retreat to machine math in tricky situations such as that, but usually a dollar of give and take makes the difference.
Rabi (& Desh): A tip is gratuity for service. I generally consider 18% to be “solid, friendly service,” and I add and subtract in increments of 1% for any deviations from that.
(Yes, in some situations the server is making less than minimum wage. All the more reason for them to do an exemplary job to earn 20% or more to make up the difference.)
I see — I think your 18% equivalency is outdated, but it’s probably different in new york city.
I would also argue that someone who is a minimum wage earner possibly has a tougher time doing what you consider to be an exemplary job; that’s more of a personal politics thing than anything else, though.
I think it’s very interesting that you and I (and everyone else) have such specific opinions on the rules of tipping. There are no rules! It’s just a gratuity! You can’t get kicked out of a restaurant for not tipping (though, you might not want to go back).
I agree, I suspect 18% is probably low for NYC. What is the gratuity typically added for large parties? I typically use that as my baseline guideline.
As for “exemplary job,” I don’t have a typical OCD-rubric, but it’s pretty much “be friendly” and “make sure nothing is missing.” It’s not like I put them through an obstacle course or anything, but if they’re surly or inattentive they shouldn’t get paid as much. Would *I* get paid as much if I was surly and inattentive? The 2% difference we’re debating is 11% – way bigger than any raise I’m eligible for.
I’m just glad I don’t have random people from the public deciding on my salary.
krisis – I agree with everything you’re saying, I just assign different numbers. 20% is the minimum (“you shouldn’t get paid as much”). if I have an excellent server and a small bill, I’ll tip up to 50%. it’s not their fault I’m a vegetarian.
as for the automatically added gratuity, I’ve seen 18% and 20% with about the same frequency, but I’ve also seen up to 23%.
desh – WORD.