• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Crushing Krisis

Comic Books, Drag Race, & Life in New Zealand

  • DC Guides
    • DC Events
    • DC New 52
    • DC Rebirth
    • Batman Guide
    • The Sandman Universe
  • Marvel Guides
    • Marvel Events
    • Captain America Guide
    • Iron Man Guide
    • Spider-Man Guide (1963-2018)
    • Spider-Man Guide (2018-Present)
    • Thor Guide
    • X-Men Reading Order
  • Indie & Licensed Comics
    • Spawn
    • Star Wars Guide
      • Expanded Universe Comics (2015 – present)
      • Legends Comics (1977 – 2014)
    • Valiant Guides
  • Drag
    • Canada’s Drag Race
    • Drag Race Belgique
    • Drag Race Down Under
    • Drag Race Sverige (Sweden)
    • Drag Race France
    • Drag Race Philippines
    • Dragula
    • RuPaul’s Drag Race
    • RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars
  • Archive
  • Contact!
You are here: Home / Personal / topics / college /

January 25, 2002 by krisis

The first time it goes off is around six in the morning, for no discernible reason. I mean, it obviously goes off because i set it to go off then, but Lindsay is constantly asking me why i set my alarm to ring four hours ahead of time. No reason other than it’s like a two-minute warning for having to wake up and deal with another day.

I was happy to have the warning this morning, since the day seemed especially dreary. I didn’t even need to look out of my tiny back window to know; i could feel the chill sliding in through the cracks and twisting up to raise goose-bumps on my legs. Deciding to sleep through my first two classes was not the most wrenching decision i’ve ever had to make.


The other thing Lindsay can’t seem to understand is why my alarm rings over and over again. I tell her it’s a warning… life ahead in four hours… three hours… until finally it’s just “Time to wake up. Fucking Blastoff.” Apparently, one ring is enough to convey the message to her. Today the blastoff ring was #6, and the reason i got me out of bed was because the sun had decided to accompany it. I was up and navigating the mess of my floor to turn down the alarm before Courtney could start screaming, and i could feel the diffuse runny-egg yellow of a damp sun on my back. The day had made an ugly duckling transformation for me, and i felt as though i was headed for something not entirely dissimilar.


It’s strange to go from kneading a palmful of shampoo past damp curls down to the suffocated scalp beneath to sliding a dime sized drop down the middle of centimeter long strands on the top of my head. It’s the shortest my hair has ever been. Stepping out past my fish-curtain i caught my nude reflection in the mirror, and something seemed different other than my hair. No new pimples, no unexpected muscles. It was something about how the slope of my shoulders changes, the line of my neck becomes smoother. And, something else as well — as if my haircut was emblematic of some greater change that was working its way out from my heart and up through the skin.

I wasn’t sure of what the change might be, but i hoped it would go well with my grey turtleneck and sexy jeans.

It wasn’t until i had gotten halfway to my destination of skipping class that i started feeling the way my reflection looked. Nothing tangible, but my change in carriage had seeped down from my neck and shoulders and out from my gut to pervade my whole being. By the time i got down to the Green Room i definitely felt different, although to everyone in the room it read as something closer to narcissistic conceit. Really, could i help wanting to have attention paid to me? I had Changed and they wanted to talk about midterms. Ridiculous.


Amazing what a $10 haircut, losing three pounds, and being in my scientifically determined sexual prime can do for morale. Whatever. I try not to dissect the positive moments of life too much. I just felt … fuckable. And, not just hot or easy or anything like that, but like someone covetable. Someone other people have strong opinions on. And, well, fuckable sounded like a good adjective at the time, but now that i’m looking at it in writing i can see where that narcissistic angle came in.


So, maybe it wasn’t so different from most other days, really, but usually i’m more of a pity fuck, you know?

Nevermind.

No related posts.

Filed Under: college, day in the life, self image, sex, vanity, Year 02 Tagged With: cold, flirt, lindsay, walking

Previous Post: « Previous Post
Next Post: Next Post »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Lindsay Wilhelmi says

    January 6, 2012 at 12:31 pm

    … it is a rather fabulous post.

    P.S. I miss many things, but your alarm going off for two hours above my head is not among them. ;-)

Trackbacks

  1. Crushing Krisis › anything but a.m. says:
    January 5, 2012 at 11:30 am

    […] my preference is for my alarm to begin ringing and hour or two before I have to set foot on the ground. That gives me some time to comes to term with the psychological ramifications of waking […]

Primary Sidebar


Support Crushing Krisis on Patreon
Support CK
on Patreon


Follow me on Twitter Contact me Watch me on Youtube Subscribe to the CK RSS Feed

About CK

About Crushing Krisis
About My Music
About Your Author
Blog Archive
Comics Blogs Only
Contact Krisis
Terms & Conditions

Crushing Comics

Marvel Comics

Marvel Events Guide

Spider-Man Guide

DC Comics

  • New Comics & Collected Editions: Marvel Comics – September 20, 2023
    Catch up on newly-released comic books and collected editions from Marvel Comics September 20 2023, with guides to every title & character! […]
  • New for Patrons: Guide to Monica Rambeau – Photon, Spectrum, & Captain Marvel
    It's time to shine a light on a Guide to Monica Rambeau. She's been Photon, Spectrum, & even Captain Marvel. Read EVERY issue in order. […]
  • Guide to Avengers (1963-1996)Updated: Guide to Avengers (1963-1996)
    Happy Anniversary to Marvel's Avengers! To celebrate I rebuilt my definitive guide to Avengers (1963-1996), including EVERY issue & collection. […]
  • Silver Age X-Men GuideUpdated: Silver Age X-Men Guide
    I've updated my definitive Silver Age X-Men Guide to collected editions of the earliest X-Men comics, including a new Penguin Classics & Taschen editions. […]
  • Guide to Conan the BarbarianUpdated: Guide to Conan The Barbarian
    I've overhauled my Guide to Conan the Barbarian to celebrate the release of Titan Comics' new Conan the Barbarian series written by Jim Zub. […]
  • Avengers Inc. (2023) #1 by Al Ewing & Leonard Kirk, released by Marvel Comics September 13 2023New Comics & Collected Editions: Marvel Comics – September 13, 2023
    Catch up on newly-released comic books and collected editions from Marvel Comics September 13 2023, with guides to every title & character! […]
  • Guide to Birds of PreyNew for Patrons: Guide to Birds of Prey
    Who are the Birds of Prey? Learn what cast members define one of DC's signature team with my Guide to Birds of Prey! […]
  • Fantastic Four (2022) #11 released by Marvel Comics September 6 2023New Comics & Collected Editions: Marvel Comics – September 6, 2023
    Catch up on newly-released comic books and collected editions from Marvel Comics September 6 2023, with guides to every title & character! […]
  • It’s gonna be May! Oh, wait, it’s ALREADY May…
    Hello, friends! Unfortunately, my non-CK life and […]
  • Drax GuideDrax Guide – now available to the public!
    Learn how the MCU merged several incarnations Drax into Dave Bautista's hyper-literal warrior with a vendetta agains Thanos in my Drax Guide! […]
  • Guide to GamoraGamora Guide – now available to the public!
    My Gamora Guide will help you find every Marvel comic starring Thanos's adopted daughter and the most dangerous woman in the galaxy! […]
  • Drag Race España Season 3, Episode 2 – “Drag Vision” Review & Power Rankings
    The queens of Drag Race España Season 3 make a collective stumble in this "Drag Vision" choreography challenge, earning the ire of the judges (though it's the kindest ire you'll ever see). […]
  • Star-Lord GuideStar-Lord Guide – now available to the public!
    Get ready for Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 with my Star-Lord Guide, including every comics appearance of Marvel's TWO distinct Star-Lords! […]
  • Drag Race Sverige Season 1, Episode 8 – Sweden Grand Finale, “Queen Delicious” runway, & season retrospective
    It's the Drag Race Sweden Grand Finale! Our final three queens put their spin on an original song and walk a final "Queen Delicious" runway alongside their eliminated peers. […]

Content Copyright ©2000-2023 Krisis Productions

Crushing Krisis participates in affiliate programs including (but not limited to): Amazon Services LLC Associates Program (in the US, UK, Canada, France, Germany, Italy, and Spain), eBay Partner Network, and iTunes Affiliate Program. If you make a qualifying purchase through an affiliate link I may receive a commission.