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You are here: Home / consume / food / And Then I Tried To Eat It

And Then I Tried To Eat It

November 17, 2006 by krisis

Note to self: You cannot transform pre-made cookie dough into cookies in the microwave.

This is especially important to consider if your cookie dough has Health Chips in it, because after 17 seconds the chips will briefly spark and go supernova in the microwave before turning into a molten black mass that will slowly shrivel back onto itself while emitting a smell akin two tons of overcooked popcorn garnished with singed human hair. Because, apparently, Health Chips include iron shavings as an ingredient.

Next time either take five minutes to preheat the toaster oven or just eat the dough raw with a spoon like you’ve been doing all week.

Filed Under: food, NaBloPoMo, Year 07

Previous Post: « Found a Catfish Haven
Next Post: NaBloPoMo Round-Up #4: Es, Us, Vs »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Mit_Moi says

    November 18, 2006 at 8:59 am

    *fanning myself* – OMG, MICROWAVING COOKIES!!
    I shudder and am not surprised at the results. Great imagery. I am totally laughing, as this brings to mind an incident from my college days. Perhaps that story will be my post for the day.

  2. Megs says

    November 18, 2006 at 7:07 pm

    I love this, and it TOTALLY sounds like something I would do.

  3. Snippy says

    November 19, 2006 at 12:16 am

    HILARIOUS. You should win something for this post alone.

Trackbacks

  1. Crushing Krisis » Don’t Play That Song / Trio of Links says:
    November 22, 2006 at 5:56 pm

    […] In closing, i feel that you should know that i am eating raw cookie-dough for dinner, and that after a content-lite day for T-Give i’ll be closing out NaBloPoMo with several more Trios and more NaBloPoMo site reviews. […]

  2. Crushing Krisis » NaBloPoMo Round-Up #7: I, J, & K Keep Me Company says:
    November 24, 2006 at 11:46 pm

    […] What better activity to kick off a week of being cold and alone than working on my NaBloPoMo reviews? Grab your leftover sandwich, kids, (or, if you’re me, your favorite bottomless pail of cookie dough) cause it’s time for I, J, and K. […]

  3. Crushing Krisis » NaBloPoMo Round-Up #9: M Defeats, O Redeems says:
    November 28, 2006 at 11:57 pm

    […] * where baked does not equal microwaved into a smoking heap […]

  4. Crushing Krisis » Happy Birthday To This says:
    August 26, 2007 at 4:19 pm

    […] Year 7 of Crushing Krisis includes a slew of favorite posts. I cursed at the television. I had a headache so profound that I gave it a name. I reinvented myself for NaBloPoMo. recounted my first heartbreak. In one trio I redefined one of my favorite songs, and debuted one that had been incubating for half a decade. I almost burned down the house baking cookies in the microwave. My life-altering nap at Bonnaroo. […]

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