Year 01

I have a lot of condoms. I couldn’t explain the how and why of it really, but i do. I never buy them or go out deliberately hunting for them, but i’ve got nearly a dozen of them in my room anyhow. It’s actually sortof like a mutant power. You know, healing factor, weather control, and the all important latex magnetism.

I don’t collect them in an sort of deliberate way, and even once i have them they are basically just strewn randomly around my room. It’s not as though i’m seeing a lot of traffic through there, if you know what i mean.

Well, this “strewning,” if you will, turns out to be the most disadvantageous way to store the things. Especially when you’re trying to find them all and put them in the bottom of an innocent box full of tylenol and allergy medication. Especially when your delerious mother is coming to help you move, and she picks up things first and asks questions later (read that as: “No, mom… don’t pick up the monitor” “Shut up, we have to finish so i can go down the shore”).

So, at work today i came to the realization that weblogging itself is an entirely passive aggressive exercise. Think about it: you write down everything that bugs you on any given day, and post it on a site. You then attempt to publicize the site, and ask your friends to head to your site, but you know from past webpage experiences that they never will. So, you’re basically left sharing all of your petty annoyances with whomever wanders in off the proverbial street, thusly getting nothing accomplished at all in the way of human interaction (but constantly feigning “concern” that someone you are blatantly gossiping about to the entire internet world might stop by your site for a quick spin one day). And the worst part is, we all seem to enjoy every passive aggressive second of it.

Just a thought.