by admin
Archives for July 2001
On the flipside, “Unstrung” is obliquely about my first exgirlfriend … inversing my feelings so that i’m bitter about her breaking up with me rather than me breaking up with her. I wrote it after having seen Peter Mulvey and Erin McKeown play at a local acoustic club. Peter and Erin are two of my favourite songwriters, and really two of my idols because neither of them are even 30 yet they know how to write amazing moving songs and they have thousands of people who gladly listen to them. I had never seen Erin play before and that night i saw her from barely five feet away and she’s very tiny but her songs were huge and towering and larger than life. So, i came home and tried to be her for a few minutes, with her jazz chords and fancy metaphor. I still prefer listening to her albums over mine, but a boy can try, can’t he?
You broke one of my heart-strings from playing around too hard; did you think it was just like me banging away on my guitar? I forget all the little things – i just know how things are, and i i’m gonna lead by your example and get far away. ’cause you poor little caged bird you never sang for me, but oh how your voice rang out after you got free. i had never before in my life heard such a beautiful noise: it sang the way you’d think my heart would sing if i had a choice, but… i’ve got a fantasy: it’s just you and me. we’re inside your room, in your bed, cause instead of leaving too soon you never left instead. Cause you left me here standing alone in the low tide, and you set out to sea like a ship rolling out with my pride. now i’m standing here all alone on the beach; just sitting here with sand on my feet but – i’ve got a fantasy. in it’s just you and me. we’re holding hands, ’cause you know in this one we never learned how to make demands. You broke one of my heart strings from playing around to hard, did you think it this was as easy as me restringing my guitar?
where is the pretty face you put on for show? i think you’re hiding that saving grace for no good reason, for later – and i’d hate you more if i didn’t watch your every move. and i will watch you put on anything you do. where is that whimsied smile that you’ve had for years? i’ve heard all about it keeping away your fears. i’d like a chance to see what those lips have wrought: i think you’d owe me that, if you just thought about it. and i will watch you do anything you choose. and i will wait for you to make your move. will it ever come?
“Will It Ever Come” is a funny little song, and the first beeside of the day to be from my demo cd. I decided that since this is theoretically bringing in an entirely new audience to add to my regular one it was okay to cheat a little and use the songs from my demo as beesides. But, anyway, it’s a special funny little song. First, that recording of it was a studio ad-lib… literally consisting of me asking if the tape was running and then playing it straight through without any extra takes, and then rewinding and adding the second vocal without even really thinking about what i was doing. Honestly, i had never even played the song all the way through before, it was just a set of lyrics i had with me.
The lyrics, which were some of the first to be featured on this blog, are their own funny little story. The night that i wrote them i had been to the house that some of the other people i do theatre with share, and one of those people was a girl that i was very much in love with at the time even though we were agreed to just be friends. I gave her a copy of my previous demo and we talked a little, and she had this winsome smile half the time, and when i got back to the dormitory i sat down and scribbled out “will it ever come” on a scrap of paper and then blogged it absentmindedly and forgot about it. If it wasn’t for my new demo it wouldn’t have ever seen the light of day.
And it was the last song i wrote about her.
I do not like it when Matt brings houseguests with him. Matt is my roommate, but i’ll talk more about that in a minute. Back to houseguests. Granted, i have kissed approximately 6% of all houseguests who i’ve spent significant time with, but the other 94% smoke, drink, play my bass without asking, take my bread out of the freezer but do not put it back, eat my instant soup, watch horrible Woody Allen films, and dirty all of my dishes. In honor of that last bit, i now have my official Blog-A-Thon Spoon, because i really don’t intend to wash any of my other dishes at any point today and all of my blogathon food can be eaten with a spoon.
Last year Matt worked in a computer science lab with Joe, who lives directly above us now and is the boyfriend of Gina, who wrote “All That’s True.” So, that’s who Matt is. I didn’t really intend to live with Matt; I don’t think he’s the sort of person i would have ever lived with had it not come right down to the wire, but when things come down to the wire in life you occasionally make exceptions. It was July or August, and i was starting to panic about getting an apartment, and i logged into Shafted one day to see Matt asking if anyone had an apartment yet and we wound up looking around together and finding this one. The entire first week of Crushing Krisis is pretty much about me procrastinating about packing, almost missing putting down my deposit on the apartment because Matt was asleep, getting sick, packing while sick, and having to spend a week at home because i almost missed putting down the deposit on my apartment. But, anyhow, now we’re exactly a year beyond that frenzy of checking classifieds for apartments, and although Matt isn’t my favourite person in the world he’s certainly not the worst roommate in it either. So, anyway, one of these frenzied nights i wrote “Will It Ever Come,” and that was a backwards seugeway.