Crushing Krisis

Comic Books, Drag Race, & Life in New Zealand

bitch

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Because i’m so very intelligent, i picked a huge fight with the president of the Campus Activities Board right in the middle of their office while i was using their computer to check my email. Sure, at the time i didn’t know he was their president (why would they elect someone so stupid?), and he’s ultimately responsible for funding and staging the Battle of the Bands, but i ripped into him all the same. Basically, the man is a total dweeb (i mean, i could beat him up… in fact, i think i might weigh more than him), and he has 0 musical aptitude. He actually started complaining about bands who name their album after a song rather than finding an unique name! He said it was the epitomy of laziness! Is he dumb? Sometimes a song is clearly the emotional center of an album, and so you make it the title track. I almost flew across the table at him when he started in on this conversation, but luckily i was held back by Kathe – who apparently cannot be driven into a homicidal blood-rage by ignorance to the arts. Hmph.

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I hate the fucking theatre. I should have trusted my first instinct and stayed away from this play. I should always trust my first instincts, and i seldom do. I did this play not because i wanted to act, but because i would get a chance to play guitar on stage and sing. Singing was secondary to the arrangement of my own song and singing it to my own accompaniment, and i just had that taken away from me. One week before the show and the director decided the song wasn’t “working” with the guitar, so he brought in a pianist. I have never in my life had to sing for/with a pianist before, i don’t know the song for the rhythm of the piano arrangement, and i hate theatre. And it’s got to work in the next 9 days because then the show opens. Except, i don’t care. The minute my director told me to put down my guitar, however apologetic he might have sounded, he flicked a switch in my brain from on to off. On was enjoying the show, coming to rehearsal ready to try new things, practicing my song every day on my own time so it would sound good that night. I have none of that now, and it might seem unprofessional, but isn’t it a bit more unprofessional to totally change my song leaving me only a week to learn it again? Yeah, i thought so too…

https://www.crushingkrisis.com/2001/02/2460338/

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So, wow, i got a huge response both in visitors and in posts from SurvivorBlog about my final words. Ian of the peanut gallery even got all huffy and called me an irritating prick! Don’t you love pushing people’s buttons? Maybe he’ll actually be around a little more often now; i think that’s the most i’ve ever seen him post in a single day as it is. To counteract his comment, MJ says she misses me already. However, none of the sBloggers expressed much remorse other than Alayna, who invited me to come and visit her in New York (an invitation that my girlfriend is less than thrilled about, i’m sure).

I honestly feel somewhat shitty about writing my last words in such a spiteful fashion; it wasn’t that i was angry, i just felt like saying everything i had neglected to say so far. Maybe i burned a bridge or two, but i at least sparked some conversation in the sBlog itself and in the Peanut Gallery, and god knows they need something to talk about these days.

https://www.crushingkrisis.com/2001/02/2398664/

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Did i think i’d win? Well, i’m not sure, but i was sure at one point that i would be among the first to go. My personality isn’t too magnetic, i’m not too agreeable, and i’m not quite as incessantly chatty as all of the other contestants. What turned out as my experience on Survivor2 wound up being wholly influenced by the real life relationship that had blossomed the weekend before sBlog2 began. And so, where typically i might have been a character more like Ryan – loud and abrasive (but loveable!), i wound up immediately sympathizing with the gals (especially Alayna and Jess) as we opened up about our personal lives.

I decided very early on what my voting order would be and why, and i stuck to it with only two corrections. At first i was wholly prepared to give Benjy the boot at the first opportunity, because he seemed to be coming on to randomly talk about something and then disappearing. Then i realized that i was only having such an issue with him because his style of logging was so similar to mine, and after i realized that i softened up and i only wound up voting against him in the tie-breaker against Serra. My other bad call early on was on Bertie, who i just didn’t get. In retrospect i just didn’t have enough attention to pay to her at the beginning, and after we weeded some people out she became one of my favourites.

But, you want more gossip, don’t you? Very well, let’s start out with Tribe two. I would’ve voted off Brad in a hot second because i have Brad issues, so that was a no-brainer. Next would have been Josi, who just didn’t catch my attention. Then would be Marcus, then Dave, Steph, Bertie, AJ, and Serra. I was never voting against Serra and as a result of that i threw her tie-braker into an extra round of tie-break when i voted against Benjy (knowing that Tammy would tie-break against Serra). Steph was a sweetheart, and i wanted her around because she was easy for me to talk to. AJ makes me laugh out loud every day, and i only ever voted against him defensively. Dave is probably the person i wanted to kick off the most; he has a lot in common with me, but i just never felt as though i needed to keep him around to feel like the blog was complete. I wound up curbing my campaign against him because no one else would vote for him.

But, then, i was rather boring too, wasn’t i? Forgive me for being a full-time student working 14 hours a week and rehearsing over 15 hours, and with a brand-new full-time girlfriend. I’m actually surprised that i seemed to be as well liked as i was… but you don’t care about that; you want dirt, right?

I hated Erik. I don’t know why; he just didn’t do anything that piqued my interest. I almost put my fist through the wall when he won immunity for his parody page; he obviously would have been given the boot before Serra or Benjy would even be considered. [Did you know that Erik would have had even more votes against him in his final stand if it wasn’t for the fact that we were trying to break up the Tribe2 Trio? All of us other than Erik who voted for AJ wanted to kick off Erik more!] While i won’t dispute who’s parody was the best, many of the IC’s were decided in truly lackluster fashion by our Peanut Gallery, who never have once collectively lived up to their duties. How many of them read the parodies? Ditto on the Banal-Blog acceptance speeches; Ian’s statement that he thought they were all dull just proved how worthless he was as a peanut [as if we hadn’t figured it out already]. Big appreciation goes out to MJ, Ken, KevRock, the G-man (who i owe a song), Tony, and all the others who actively got in on the action. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Benjy would’ve been the next person i would have voted against, just because i wouldn’t have had the heart to vote off any of the girls. Sorry Benjy! Next off would’ve been… um… well, let me go backwards. I would have never voted against Alayna – i decided early on that she was my favourite logger and i would never vote her off, and told her as much early in the proceedings. Alayna is one of the nicest most genuine people i’ve ever met and i intend to stay friends with her long after the blog ends (though it’s obviously over already for me). The only real alliance i ever formed was with Alayna; that i wouldn’t vote for her and we’d try to protect each other. I don’t know if she would’ve kept following up on her intent, but i certainly would have.

As for the other four – C, Jess, Tammy, and Ryan – i’m just not sure. I think i was very attached to C and Jess, but i never had much time to get to know either of them. Ryan and Tammy are a different matter entirely; i find Tammy entirely amusing and i love the way she fends off attacks on her person, but at the same time i never felt like we ever had any sort of connection other then when we haggled over who would step in for the infamous game of Chinese Checkers. Having said that, i’ll also say that i probably would’ve stuck up for her for a long time. Ryan was the opposite; totally easy to get along with, but his content bored me to tears most of the time. However, Ryan had the uncanny ability to actually tap into his emotions every so often, which Tammy didn’t do much that i noticed. I think when it came down to it, i would have booted Ryan rather than Tammy (, but i might have hung on to Bertie over either of them).

Final words? I had fun! I love all of you people! However, you all managed to vote off more and more of the interesting and opinionated people, leaving us only with the middle of the road. Voting off Serra, who had challenging things to say about love, sex, and relationships, as opposed to Dave, our resident Mr. Nice? Voting off Benjy with his quirkiness and programming skills rather than Ryan, who’s just got the lewd sex stuff going for him? Maybe i come off sounding a bit harsh, but it seems i was the one of the last people consistently attempting to make valid and continuous conversation. Was it mostly about my girlfriend and totally irrelevant? Yes. But, did it always respond to everyone else and try to say something new? Totally. I started the first deep conversation we had; I wonder if we’ll see any more of them.

Ok, that’s enough dish. Good luck to all, and if you vote off Alayna i’m coming to your house with a crowbar.

xoxoxox!

https://www.crushingkrisis.com/2001/02/2379789/

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So, yeah, theatre. First i bitched about it, and then i got sucked into it, and here i am bitching about it again. I don’t like to act. Maybe i’m good at it, and maybe i’m not, but i only really like the attention i get and being able to stand on a stage above everyone else. That’s it, though. And, yet, somehow i’ve managed to have rehearsal every night and a song i have to arrange and sing and now i’ve got to learn how to method-act my hand being crippled for half of the show. And i have to learn how to scream.

I’m thinking that last bit won’t be to hard. In the show i get struck hard with a hot curling iron, and it both breaks the bones in my hand and burns me badly. My director keeps trying to give me suggestions on how i could perfect this prolonged scream of anguish and despair, some of which were: “Haven’t you ever put your hand into a fire before?” “Go home and try pouring hot wax on yourself. I can give you some pointers on sensitive spots to try.” “Stick your head into an oven later! And make sure to vocalize through the pain.”


Good direction, isn’t it. It’s like in high school … i had to play these two brief minutes of being drunk, and i just didn’t know how to do it. I was straightedge, i was innocent, and i had no idea what alchohol did to human body. My director coaxed and fixed and pointed and when it came time for performance i still looked like some foolish kid who was a little bit dizzy. In retrospect, he should’ve just bought me a bottle of vodka and let me learn the easy way. So, i’m off to find some hot wax… yum.

https://www.crushingkrisis.com/2001/01/2110463/