Krisis Novel

Even more than I enjoy Author’s Notes (and oh boy do I love a good Author’s Note), I love when authors provide behind-the-scenes commentary on their writing. If I’m going to be releasing Krisis out in into the wild, you can better believe I’m going to do a commentary track.

Perhaps three chapters is too small a denomination to dive deeply into, but the entire point of my posting this novel is to expose my process – and this is all process.

Haven’t read any of Krisis yet? No problem – here’s Chapter 1 (pt. 1 & 2), Chapter 2, and Chapter 3 (pt. 1 & 2).

on the “Issues”

The impetus for me to finally write this novel was Eric Smith and his audiobook for Textual Healing. In fact, I was originally writing quite specifically with creating a full-cast audio play in mind as my means of distribution.

That meant I was concerned with having a number of smaller chunks of rising and falling action throughout the plot that could be digested separately from the whole. As I was in the beginnings of my X-Men acquisition quest at the time, I was struck with the idea of “issues” of the novel. Each issue would consist of a trio of chapters, always setting up, rising, and then pushing the narrative forward. While I wouldn’t offer quite as much exposition for new readers as an issue of a comic book, each issue starts relatively cleanly after a point you could easily summarize in a quick “The Story So Far” recap.

It was as much to keep potential future audio-casts interesting as it was to give me a series of small goals to conquer in the course of my writing. I remain enamored with the issues, since that’s how I’ve been writing it this entire time. We’ll see how they stand up for you, the reader.

on first impressions

Ever since the first day of National Novel Writing Month in 2010 the first line of this book was:

“Nathan wasn’t a man of faith or of ritual, except for on April tenth.”

Then, in a fit of pique just before I posted the chapter, I changed it to:

“Everything felt different on April tenth.”

I changed it for two reasons. First, the “wasn’t a man” version was reliant on playing off of the next line being “He wouldn’t even tell you that he was a man, necessarily.” Having the first two lines of a book tell you all about what a character is not seemed like starting on the wrong foot.

That had bothered me for a while, but the other, more subtle problem was that Nathan is a man of faith or ritual on days other than April 10th! All throughout this chapter he talks about the little rituals he has with Ella. And, saying he had no faith is me being an obstinate agnostic rather than saying something useful about the character.

“Everything felt different on April tenth” is a much more fitting first line, considering everything that occurs to Nathan in the following week.

on white not being the default

It’s obvious (and will become more obvious) that Nathan is based on me and that Martina is based on Gina. The main character of Krisis was always a personal stand-in stretching back to the earliest drafts I wrote in eighth grade.

Relatively late in the editing process (three years in?) I realized that while Nathan started as me, he wasn’t me anymore. In fact, he had became equally connected to E’s little brother in the little details of his backstory that took up residence in the crannies of my brain.

Essential to that, he was no longer a white character, but a mixed-raced character. [Read more…] about Book Notes on Krisis, Issue #1

From last week…

“What if we stopped by to check on her?” Valerie said.

Suddenly, Danny’s face leaned into the picture. He had practically climbed across the table to insert himself between Nathan and Valerie.

“I’m sorry, did you say ‘we’?”

“Yes, Danny.” She said his name pointedly as though she was addressing a small child, “Nathan and I. I get to try a restaurant, he gets to say he was headed out to dinner with a work friend and decided to stop by.”

“You don’t have to do that,” Nathan said, feeling he ought to mount at least a weak protest.

“It doesn’t sound like Ella has any adults present in her life other than you, Nate.” Valarie uncrossed her arms and placed one hand on top of Nathan’s. This was shocking to him, as he had temporarily forgotten he had hands. “I know what it’s like to lose a family member when you’re young. If she got upset in front of you, maybe she’s too afraid, or embarrassed, or whatever to talk. But, you have to know if she’s okay. ”

Now it was Nathan’s turn to blush – not at her hand (still touching his!), or her offer to visit Ella with him (and the dinner date she effectively demanded), but at her calling him “Nate.” Nathan had always been impervious to nicknames – Martina’s family were the only people in the world to call him Nate. Or, at least, the only ones he appreciated.

.

Krisis, Book 1

Issue #1: Girl Disappearing
Chapter Three: Dissemblers (pt. 1)

To say it had been a long afternoon at work would be a vast understatement. After his lunch with Danny and Valerie, the end of the day seemed to recede to a vanishing point in the far flung future while Nathan worried himself to complete distraction.

Most of his worry was about Ella. She had been on his mind since the tenth, but unloading his concerns onto Danny proved to be the utter opposite of helpful. Now he was just more concerned. Had he been wrong to leave her alone in her apartment? He texted Ella to say he would drop by later with a friend in tow, but she sent no reply.

The remainder of his worry was about the dropping by.

With Valerie.

Nathan could still hardly believe that she had taken an interest in his life long enough to actually propose they go on a date.

Not really a date. An intervention, possibly followed by dinner.

Amidst his worrying, Nathan tried to convince himself that their unexpected arrangement was far better than an actual date, because it was real – not some manufactured situation meant to keep two people in close proximity for the evening. They were getting together to discuss a common interest.

Dead family members and the resulting emotional trauma. Much more romantic than an actual date. [Read more…] about Krisis, Issue #1, Chapter Three: Dissemblers (pt. 1)

From last week…

Nathan put his hand on Ella’s shoulder and spun her body around towards his. “Ella, you have to calm down. What’s wrong? Just tell me what’s…”

Their eyes met and now he realized what seemed so strange about them on the couch. Ella’s gaze was fixed on his face, but her pupils were completed dilated – huge black discs with just a tiny ring of hazel around the outside. Nathan recoiled slightly at the sight. Both her hands were clenched tightly into fists, pressed close to her chest, knuckles white.

“Mom knew, Nathan, and now you know and he’s going to come. But I see now that you find her. You find her, you find her, but I can’t see…” She paused, gasping for air, as if she had ran down and back up her twisting stairwell.

“Ella, your eyes…” Nathan faltered for words. “Please, I don’t understand. Did you…did you do some kind of drugs? Just slow down and talk to me.”

He awkwardly held her, not knowing how close he should be. It was their first hug.

“You finally find her,” she breathed into his chest. He looked down at her face to see her pupils begin to contract, the hazel of her eyes expanding until the black was just a pin point in the middle of a sea of gray and green. She looked down at her hands as if they didn’t belong to her, still clenched tightly against her chest between them, still heaving as if she had ran a mile.

Krisis, Book 1

Issue #1: Girl Disappearing
Chapter Two: Unintended

“And you let her stay there by herself?”

Danny regarded Nathan incredulously and sunk his teeth deep into the skin of a bright red apple, snapping another crunchy mouthful out of the fruit.

“You don’t know how Ella gets. She’s so stubborn.” Nathan felt exasperated just thinking about it. “She insisted she was just freaking out about me saying Martina’s name, and the potatoes, and the potatoes maybe not being as good as Martina’s potatoes, or possibly being better than Martina’s potatoes, and not knowing which would be worse.”

Danny spoke through his mouthful of apple, “v’at es ucked up, ‘an.”

Nathan sat across an orange Formica-topped table from Danny in the bustling cafeteria at Khep Right Industrial’s Philadelphia campus.

The cafeteria was located in Nathan’s building, the taller of the two on campus. It was a cavernous, multi-level space furnished in an unfortunate pastiche of kitschy retro diner and corporate industrial. The result was something like eating dinner in a subway car – lots of cheerful, brightly colored plastic surfaces complemented by stainless steel. Utterly cacophonous and all very easy to hose down.

That was Khep Right Industrial to a tee: efficient, functional, and maybe slightly discomforting.

Danny finished chewing his bite of apple and set the fruit down on his plastic tray, reaching for a carton of milk. “Do you believe her?” Danny asked before taking a chug of his milk. “About the potato business, I mean.”

“I don’t know, Danny. It was scary. She was scary. It didn’t seem like she was in control of what she was doing or saying. One minute she was speaking gibberish, the next minute she was fine, munching on pizza.”

“And you don’t think she’s on drugs?” Danny asked, before taking another chug from his milk carton.

Nathan sighed. “I did think that, at first. Now I’m not sure. I mean, I went to college, I’ve seen people on just about everything. Nutmeg, even. But the whole episode only lasted for a minute or two, and I had been with her for a little while at that point. I guess she could have taken something before I got there…”

Nathan’s rambling was interrupted by Danny tossing his now-empty milk carton onto the table.

“You know what I think?”

“No, but I’m about to.” [Read more…] about Krisis, Issue #1, Chapter Two: Unintended